#29: That Perfect Blue
I’m humbled, happy, and honored to express my deep thanks to Ben and everyone at Take the Handle for featuring me in their latest issue, The Youth Issue, and to be featured alongside so many talented others. Do poke around!
I’m on lucky page 33!
That Perfect Blue
That perfect blue tee shirt. Faded to perfection. Nothing captured the imagination and adventure of childhood, the essence of that cosmic youth spirit like that perfect blue tee shirt that I wore down to the fibers. The perfect blue tee shirt that heroically stood for everything there was to bein’ a kid.
My perfect blue tee shirt was the reason I eternally tried to sleep through ballet class on Saturday mornings, or wiggle my way out of any affair requiring an ensemble subject to the norms of Mom and Dad—anything was possible in my threadbare darling and any moment spent not wearing it was time standing between me and my dreams.
Maybe it’s the expanse of the big blue sea, the infinity of the great blue sky, or something like the depth of forever young James Dean’s misty cobalt blue eyes—the perfect shade of blue in anything assures us that everything is possible.
Of course I’ll never know exactly what happened to my precious blue tee shirt, lost in the flood of adolescence. Maybe it landed in the wash one too many times with a new hole or hopeless stain to Mom’s dismay, or maybe it fell into a black hole under my bed during the train wreck chapter of my life that was Middle School, never to be seen again.
To this day I will stop at nothing to find that perfect blue quality in anything. Thus far all efforts have been futile, culminating in a damaging obsession that has led to mile-high stacks of unworn denim up and down my closet walls, a heartbreaking collection of uncelebrated blue striped tee shirts, and an erratic love-hate relationship with chambray. Whenever I think I’ve found my blue again, upon close inspection only does it become more apparent: it’s not my blue.
I know it’s out there, somewhere. The years of searching are not in vain. Like all great love stories of our time, I’ll find it one day—or die trying. Meanwhile, life, love, and the pursuit of the perfect blue continue.
Wherever you are, dear blue tee shirt, I’m thinking of you.